On April 9th, 2012, the challenge was issued on Facebook: "10 points to the best Jewish Haiku on the irrational Pesach feeling of an imaginary food shortage." One day and over 50 entries later, here are the results:
First Prize (10 Pesach Points):
A Pesach highlight:
My mom's long-lost plum brisket
Somewhere, she's kvelling
Alix Wall
Second Place (5 Pesach Points):
Seder leftovers
could feed all homeless a week
still fill our fridges
Ruth Petersen Shorer
Lots of Other Awesome Entries:
Seen through tears and glass,
Cafe Flore's forbidden cake.
Dodi kvar lo li?
Rabbi David Dunn Bauer
We have lots of food
But we need to feel deprived
Pass the matzah brei.
Debbie Bamberger
Parsley tastes okay
Charoset is pretty good
But bagels, sublime.
Debbie Bamberger
I shopped for a month
To eat for eight days?! Now I'm
Not even hungry.
Adam Hoffstetter
hungry abundance
chol hamoed pesach see
food but no chametz
Kayla Garelick
What if we run out
Of pesachdich cheese? Or worse,
If we have leftovers?
Jo-Ellen Pozner Zeitlin
If I had one brick
for every matzo, I could
build a city block.
Michelle Tremaine
I used to hunger
Now I eat much kitnyot
Crazy ashkenazim!
Simon Firestone
b'khol dor va dor
oblige yourself to hunger
despite a full fridge
Sarit Horwitz
twelve guests, two briskets;
should I make the chicken too?;
I'll make the bird too.
Beth Zygielbaum
For a vegan Jew
This isn't even hard -- it's
ha! -- a piece of cake.
Pauline Yearwood
It's very trendy,
The latest food fad online --
Eight gluten-free days.
Pauline Yearwood
why do i hunger
for lack of leaven when i
don't even eat gluten?
Dr. Yehuda Kurtzer
On Passover Jews
are a stiff-necked, stiff egg white
stiff-boweled people
Dr. Yehuda Kurtzer
Gefilte fish swims
Away from the horseradish
I help them make peace
Laynie Tzena
My friend brought me cake
Dark chocolate and Pesadich
I always liked her
Laynie Tzena
He said we could have
His chicken, now that he's gone
To join the vegans
Laynie Tzena
Why didn't I block
Bertucci's ads from Facebook
Now I crave pasta
Debra Hirsch Corman
Been through the pantry
So full of food-like junk, yet
There's nothing to eat
Yosef Goldman
Entering freedom
burns many a calorie
(so I tell myself)
Yosef Goldman
ShopRite Pesach Aisle
Just in case you get stuck in
Pesach for a month.
Gella Solomon
Too much matzah blech
No real food in sight for days
The indigestion
Robin Haber Freyberg
Come to Israel
where everything is kosher,
oh no, kitniyot!
Arie Hasit
No shortage for me
I eat Pesach food all year!
Quinoa, kale, fish, fruit
Jordan Namerow
Out without a snack
Forgot to prepare something
Buying a banana
Brian Schachter-Brooks
Let all those hungry
Enter and eat the leftovers
But not the brisket
Falynn Schmidt
No rolls or pasta,
Seven days of nothing but,
Flat, dry, dusty, crumbs.
Marc Gottlieb
potato starch box
languishes in the pantry
"just in case," she says
Hope Levav
No bread? I will starve!
Buy, lest I run out of food...
Siege mentality!
Benjamin Epstein
One G-d, two tablets,
Three matzot, four cups, four sons,
Five more days to go.
Rabbi Rob Scheinberg
ShopRite Manager:
Please don't clear the Pesach shelf
until Thursday night.
Rabbi Rob Scheinberg
Matzah shelf was bare
At Berkeley Bowl this morning
It's only day three
Alix Wall
Fourth day of Pesach
fourth day of baseball; Phillies
losing. Vey iz Mir.
Ethel Goldberg
Going on a trip
During Chol HaMoed time
Packing up kitchen
Lisa Schachter-Brooks
Crack! The heavy feast
Breaks the table leg - or just
The Afikomen?
Kevi Equality
molly stone's is closed
there is plenty of matzah
i am sick of eggs...
Shosh Anderson
Belly aches badly
Plenty of stinky gasses
Nothing coming out!
Brad Walter
Not by bread alone
Shall we live. There is matzah.
And that's about all.
Sheyna Galyan
Where's the potatoes?
I said, WHERE's the potatoes??
Did you eat them all???????????!
Julie Seltzer
Fifteen for Seder
Are seven kugels enough
Must make more tonight
Andrea Lavender
Matzoh: baked, boiled, fried,
Afflicted with food we cry,
There's nothing to eat!
Varda Epstein
At first, a nice crunch:
Then it seems awfully plain.
Day Five: Please, No More!
Rabbi Ruth Adar
In the desert we
ate manna. Now we cook for
days, to remember.
Suzi Brozman
empty space near matzah
where my chocolate usually lives
no craving, just free
Reba Connell
Like a tzunami
Terrifying, engulfing
Emptiness threatens.
Toby Klein Greenwald
Eleven dozen eggs
(Chametz chicken feed, can't buy
More) WE'LL STARVE! WE'LL STAAAAARVE!!
Shifra Pride Raffel
I am in New York.
Thirty-plus kosher places
Are open Pesach.
Joshua Diamant
Facebook jealousy
Gnaws my matza-filled guts as
Josh D. eats take-out.
Shifra Pride Raffel
Shifra, I haven't.
But if I wanted to eat
Out, well then I could.
Joshua Diamant
Not enough matzah
My insides are screaming MORE
Must eat tasteless food
Jennifer Massie
Like to eat matzah
NOT! It fills me up too much
I prefer salads
Jennifer Massie
I want kitniot
Why follow this absurd rule
For so many years?
Aliza Amy Olenick Segal
keeping pesach rules
makes keeping kosher year round
easy as pizza
Barbara Solomon-Speregen
Matzah crumbs underfoot
Remind us we're on a trek
to Torah itself
Barbara Solomon-Speregen
Eighteen rows of holes
I slowly, slowly nibble
one more matza sheet.
Marisa Elana James
So it costs a lot...
KP tequilla - hooray!
Guac, matzah - olé!
Rabbi Gail Labovitz
I look in the fridge.
Something jump out and feed me!
I get no response...
Jessica Senders Weinberg